It's not all about the RULES you big dummy!

I get it, I get it. I really get it on Friday night as everyone at work heads for the bar, a party, or to sit at home & drink away the 60-80 hour work week. Actually, we kind of laugh at 60 hour work weeks out here in North Dakota...but that's a WHOLE other post. You get it right, what I'm talking about? People are SO ready to go home, get wasted, & forget about another insane week of work that they can't possibly fathom someone wouldn't want to do the same. In fact, when it comes to meeting & talking to a Latter-day Saint (you probably call them Mormons), it seems like all anyone wants to talk about is what we "can" and "can't" do. First, the idea the "the Church tells you what to do" means that a person saying that has never been to a 3-hour meeting block & certainly hasn't watched a full 2-hour session of General Conference. Church is much more about sharing our experience with each other and offering helpful advice and spiritual insights we have gained as a result of our own earthly experience. Second, no one will ever be barred from coming to Church because they drink, or smoke, or cuss, or a multitude of other "sins". We don't have a confessional (although breaking the law of chastity, or severely breaking the word of wisdom in the form of alcoholism and/or drugs probably means you'll want to talk with a Bishop to get help to get back on track), so there is no place for you to go to openly admit your guilt for anything. For some reason, people will talk about their sins from the pulpit during "Fast & Testimony Meeting" on the 1st Sunday of each month when there is an "open pulpit"...but we actually prefer you don't do that. It's usually never fast, and it's not much of a testimony either. If you have a serious issue that needs resolving, start with your spouse & family, then your home teachers if you need outside help, & then the Bishop if you need Priesthood Authority...but DON'T talk about it from the pulpit. Third, when it comes to "rulebooks" in the Church, they are usually more about "how to" then "what to" or "what not to". BUT, despite our lived experience, those not of our faith constantly ask: "Can you do this?" "Are you allowed to do that?" "If this happens then can you...?" They always want to talk about things we can't do...it boggles many minds to think that we would so voluntarily give up "fun" things. That's where the...well, no on would ever give that up, so they must be FORCED to stop doing all those things. People...people...people, you have it all wrong. It's not about what we can or can't do; it's about what we do and don't believe. THAT is why everyone who ultimately becomes a Latter-day Saint (a Mormon) STAYS a Saint. See, what we really want you to ask about are the following: What or who was I before I lived here on Earth? Does G_d REALLY have a body? Is G_d REALLY omnipotent...or omniscient...or omnipresent? Why do terrible, horrible things happen to good people? Does G_d interact with the world, and to what degree? Should I be scared that at my wedding they said: "till death do you part"? Is it true that your Church says I can still be married when I'm resurrected? Can I have my children after this life as my children? Is G_d married? See, the answer to ALL of these questions are REALLY important. Their answers and the sum of our experience that often confirm the truthfulness of the answers is why so many of us (now over 14 million people world wide) are Latter-day Saints. It's the DOCTRINE silly! Imagine that you are interviewing for a new job. You go, they ask you questions, you ask them questions, they tell you a little about the job. You are presented with an offer that is better than what you currently have and you start going to work without really knowing the full range of everything you'll be asked to for work. You are excited because you know it's a better job. But, in the beginning, things are tough. There are all sorts of new people and procedures to work through. You often find you have questions about what to do next or if this or that should be avoided. You even learn that there are some people at work that you probably don't want to have to work with. You have to learn who to listen to (who has good advice) and who should be avoided as much as possible. You get a few questions and you just end up with more questions the more you work. Eventually, you settle into your grove, you feel good about your new life, & you handle challenges when they come up. You put out fires as they pop up. You don't necessarily look for a promotion, but if you do a good job you may get offered one. You learn who the other people are that are committed to excellence and you work with them as often as possible. They make you feel good about being a part of the team. One day you may even do well enough that the company offers you your own store, or a district, or area to be in charge of. YOU get to be the boss now that you've proven yourself able to be trusted with the responsibility of running your own show...even though you still technically have a boss. Yes, being a Latter-day Saint is like that. You start a new believe system because it offers you a promise of a better life. You don't have all the answers up front, but you learn and grow. You become "part of the team". Eventually you have lots of questions, all of which get answered. It's the answered questions that endures us to the LDS Church. It's like Radio Shack (not the going bankrupt part), where they say: "You've got questions and we've got answers." The "rules" are the result of someone saying: "OK, I did this thing...I'm a Mormon now...what do I do differently now?" The "rules" help people answer the question of what changes should I make in my life now that I'm LDS? What should I eat? What should I drink? What should I watch or listen to? The rules don't come first & then you become LDS. You become LDS and you learn HOW to be a Latter-day Saint. It's a process. The rules don't keep you from happiness. Once you have happiness, the rules help you stay there. It's like buying something from Walmart...if you aren't completely satisfied, you can go back to your old life...but I bet you won't. Not if you are looking for a promotion you wont. We all know the people that you have worked with that were there for a week and realized that it was a lot more hard work than they planned on. Then they never show up the 2nd week & before you know it they've moved on, were fired, or quit. If you can make it six months, coming to Church every week, reading your scriptures, and attend General Conference. You'll get it...it's not about the rules at all. It's about what we believe. We can answer all the questions up above...and so many more. Even better YOU can have the answers to all those questions. You can find out for yourself as you ask in prayer and then read the scriptures and words of the modern prophets. See, we do think that one can have true happiness...right now...in this world. All they have to do is ask a few questions and get some answers. Then, if they decide they want more...we can help them learn how to live a different life. The rules are reminders of what will take our eye "off the prize". The rules help you stay out of trouble...out of jail...and out of despair. So, the next time you find out someone you know is a Mormon. Instead of asking them what they can and can't do...consider asking them what they can and do believe.

My Favorite Month

I just couldn't shake this darn cold. It had been with me for weeks and didn't seem to be getting better any time soon. On Tuesday night I had to change sleepwear 3 times in the middle of the night. I kept waking up soaking wet and I didn't get anywhere close to a full night's sleep. When I got to work I was determined to make it to the end of the day. I get paid good money to work, but I get a whole lot more when I make it into overtime & double time...that's where the bills get paid.

At around 11am though I was in terrible shape and was using wet paper towels to wipe my nose. I couldn't use a dry cloth or towel because it would tear up my nose in the shape I was in. I was starting to get some looks from the guys I work with on the desk. By the time lpm rolled around, I couldn't stop shivering. I was back & forth between hot flashes and cold sweats. I couldn't keep my temperature regulated and it was getting hard to type on the keyboard.

By 3pm I couldn't take it much longer and I needed to get home and sleep this off. By 7pm I was asleep for the night. I went through a few more sets of clothes Wednesday night and woke up around 7am the next day. I felt like someone had shot me in the chest when I was fully awake. I had already text messaged work to let them know I had to see the doctor before I made it in to work. I couldn't stop shivering and I felt like something was in my lungs. I know that when it comes to not being able to breath that things become serious.

I waited for hours in the waiting room and had one goal when someone finally saw me: get a chest x-ray to prove that I had fluid in my lungs. I managed to convince them that my condition was serious enough to necessitate a chest x-ray. We finally made our way to the lab and within 30 minutes the doctor was writing me a prescription for medicine to help me get over pneumonia. I had talked with my Mom, a nurse, before hand and she had given me a probably diagnosis of pneumonia...so I knew exactly what I wanted to get from the doctor. It worked out perfectly...and I wasn't going to be headed back to work soon...not until I wasn't contagious any more.

My biggest concern was being ready for Monday. A week or so earlier I had been asked to teach Seminary. Seminary is where high school students at our Church show up at 6:30am to learn about the Scriptures (Old Testament, New Testament, Book of Mormon, & the Doctrine & Covenants). It goes for close to an hour and it's a ton of fun. Thanks to all my education in philosophy & religion and my Masters of Divinity, the hard part has never been preparing for a lesson. The most difficult thing about teaching Seminary is waking up before 6am every day. I tried waking up at 6am and just couldn't get prepared for the lesson, dressed, & to Church on time. This wasn't the first time I've taught Seminary. I taught for an entire year in California and it was a tremendous experience. Seminary is actually what introduced me to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Whenever I'm asked why I joined the LDS Church I tell them two things: doughnuts & girls. My friend, Nick Thomas, gave me a copy of the Book of Mormon when I was searching for a Church. After reading some of it I asked him what I could do to learn more and he told me they get doughnuts on Fridays. I wasn't doing anything at 6:30am and thought...why not. I was impressed with the ladies I met when I showed up that Friday and I never stopped coming. Eventually I came to the conclusion that there was something to the Book of Mormon and the LDS Church. I asked the Seminary teacher to baptize me and I became a Latter-day Saint myself.

When I taught Seminary in California, I encouraged my students to invite those who were not of our faith on Fridays when we had doughnuts. They did just that and it worked for me, just as it had for my teacher in high school all those years ago. It didn't hurt that we had a 1/2 dozen or so young women in our class just like I had all those years ago when I was in high school. Before the year was over, I was asked to baptize one of my students, Max Sneery. It was pretty terrific to see the story play out all over again with another young person. The magic formula of doughnuts and girls worked again.

All this tradition and history was in jeopardy if I couldn't get healthy enough by Monday to get out of bed. I spent nearly all weekend reading the Old Testament and sleeping. By the time Monday rolled around...I was in good enough shape to show up for the first day with my box of medicines I had to take 3 times a day...but I made it.

The month was amazing. I'm a stickler for footnotes and I try to have the kids go to them whenever something doesn't make sense the first time you read it. I may just have to do a separate post for my themes of the Hebrew Bible (or Old Testament). It's always a tremendous experience to teach Seminary and bonds are formed between teacher and student. It's a special experience to arise early with the students...part of the benefit of shared sacrifice. I wouldn't miss teaching Seminary for the world...but it has it's price.

Half-way through my Month of substituting, I moved to the 10am-10pm shift. This means that getting in bed by 11pm would be a best case scenario. It also meant that I'd have to wake up at 5:15am in order to be prepared for the class each morning. Despite burning my candle at both ends I made it the entire month after getting hit with pneumonia right before I started teaching.

I sailed through...that is until the last day I taught. It felt like a Friday. Even though I had work the next day, I didn't have to wake up at 5:15am thanks to a school holiday on Good Friday and I was pumped. I had waited a month to be able to sleep in. I'm a big fan of staying up late to get done what needs to be done. I am not, however, that excited about getting up early. I really can't stand it. When I went to work on Thursday, everyone kept asking what was up with my eye. My right eye looked a little bit like pink eye and I hadn't got to sleep until close to 1am that Thursday morning because of an exceptionally late night at work. I knew I was close to getting sick all week...I could feel it. Well, by the time noon rolled around I had the wet cloths out and was dabbing at my eyes. Closer to 3/4pm I was having to go to the bathroom every 30 minutes or so to clean the mucus out of my eyes so that I could see straight and keep my eyes open. By the time 7pm rolled around my eyes were watering constantly and it was clear I was going to need to get something done about this before I came to work on Friday morning.

When I woke up on Friday morning I couldn't open my eyes at all. During the night I had kept my eyes closed as I had woken up twice in the middle of the night twice to use the bathroom. I know the room well enough to navigate it with my eyes closed without falling over anything or walking into anything. It took a hot shower in the morning to wash out whatever was keeping my eyes shut. When I finally was able to open them up and look in the mirror it was clear they weren't going to let me come in looking like I did. It was a cross between being stung by a bee (swelling) and being turned into a Vampire (with blood red eyes). They were desperate to brand me with pink eye the day before at work. I was desperate to find something to put on my eyes so that I could get back to work.

I had managed to get a bacterial infection of both eyes and was told several times: "it wasn't pink eye" and "you are not going back to work". Once again...it looked like I wasn't headed back to work thanks to my latest contracted sickness. When was driving around town to get my prescription and some things I needed at Walmart it finally hit me. Despite how hard I had pushed myself for the month I taught Seminary, I had been protected the entire time I taught Seminary. I went for weeks without getting a full nights sleep. I magically managed to get to the Church each morning on time or a few minutes after despite going to bed way after I should have. Each day I was able to arrive prepared to teach. Most importantly, the students and parents thanked me at several junctures along the way for the effort I was putting in. It's not hard to keep going when you get encouragement like that from those you are teaching.

Despite really putting the pedal down for weeks on end; I managed to both start when I needed and and make it all the way to the end of my month of teaching. As I left Walmart it was hard to tell the difference in the tears coming down my face from the infection and those coming from the realization that I had been watched over and protected for a month so that I could assist in the work of the Lord. It's a tremendous feeling to know that you've been watched over like I was. I don't believe in coincidences...but I do believe in G_dincidences. I'm grateful for the experience I had teaching Seminary and even more so to know that the Lord was with me in my journey. That means that the students got a lot more than just the words that came out of my mouth. I may not be ready to jump back in there and teach Seminary right now...but I hope this isn't the last time. The next time might not be so obviously, but I don't think it's the last time I'll find out after the fact that I've been watched over either. I look forward to both experiences.

Eternal Perspective Part II

My friend Chuck will be happy to hear me remind everyone that "only the Sith deal in absolutes". I'll have to agree with Yoda on that one, & after I finished writing about how I felt about having an Eternal Perspective in my previous post...I'm going to take some of those words back...and I'll tell you why.

While I maintain that using the idea of an Eternal Perspective to call a people or congregation into submission is far from ideal; the idea works quite well when you apply it to yourself. How can that be possible? Before we dive in, check out the video so that we can start with the same knowledge:



See, the problem with this life is that it's hard...terribly hard. You will be tried, tested, brought to your knees...even the very breaking point when you want to give up. This is hard to take. It's hard to go to sleep at night without those you love. It's hard to sleep in your car, to work all night long, to give and give when it feels like you need to just get for once. All of us will go there at some point. In fact...we should hope that we do. See, we've been told clearly that we will not be tested beyond what we can bear. If you have not been brought to your knees...then it is possible that more work needs to be done. I suppose it's possible to make it through this existence without really being tested...but I doubt it.

We are better for the refiners fire. Bones once broken are stronger. Metal with proper welds applied is stronger. Knowledge tested repeatedly and used frequently is stronger. When rules are broken and we repent, our resolve to avoid future mistakes is...you guessed it...stronger. It is part of the process, and despite the pain we feel while we reside in the midst of the burning trial by fire...we will in fact be stronger for it. There was a talk recently given in which the speaker spoke of a young boy going through chemotherapy. The boy asked the doctor if he will be back to normal when the treatment is over. The doctor replied, I'm afraid not...you will be better than you were before. The same holds true for us as we are tried by life. I am reminded of the Lord's answer to Joseph Smith in D&C 122 when he pleaded with Him to end his suffering in Liberty Jail. The Lord responded in D&C 122:8 "The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?"

The answer, however difficult it is to utter, is no...we are not greater than He. But that is of great importance to Him, for we know from Moses 1:39 that "For behold, this is my work and my glory -- to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." That great God, for which we are no better...God's only goal is our immortality and eternal life. THIS, US, is what creates, grows, and IS God's glory. How do we connect the dots now?



When I child dies, the worst thing we could say to the parent is that it's all part of God's plan...absolute worst. But, to those parents, the only thing that may get them through the day is that they can be united with that child again one day through the sealing power of the Temple. When long hours at work separate husband from wife and children...it is important to remember that this will not always be the case. When the fire of affliction and trial burn hottest, it is comforting to know that the suffering does not last indefinitely. When a spouse dies and the future may be faced alone...there is comfort in knowing that the ability to be reunited is possible...all is not lost thanks again to the sealing power of the Temple.

When life is at it's darkest moments, having an eternal perspective is often the only way to make it through with a smile. Because things will be different after this life, it's possible to laugh when life kicks you. It's possible to smile instead of cry when the thought of a deceased loved one crosses our consciousness. My grand parents are gone and I didn't leave my Grandad on the best terms. This has haunted me for over a decade at this point. But I know that he has already forgiven my ill informed decision made at a young age. I know that one day, if I make good decisions going forward, he'll tell me he's proud of the man I've become. I know one day, maybe even soon, my Dad will leave this Earth and it will be up to me to take care of my Mom. I look forward to the day that I will be able to return and report to him that the task was executed to the greatest extent I possibly could. One day, I may have to face the loss of Rachel, Novan, Beya, Iyov, or Keshet...and it will hurt like hell...and the only thing that will get me through each day is the eternal perspective that they are far from lost to me. Death is simply the temporary separation of people who love each other.

Death is forever temporary. While Lucifer lorded death over our heads for centuries...he lost that battle at the point Christ was resurrected. And if we will but let ourselves see through the fleetingness of this life and have an eternal perspective...death will never haunt us again. For if your faith does not provide for the belief in an after life...consider a change. Who even cares if it's true? I sure don't. If someone managed to provide proof to me that everything I believed was false...I'd live it anyway.

Why do such an irrational thing? If you, like Job, lost everyone you loved by the end of next week. You tell me what thought will get you through the day: 1) You will never see them again or 2) You'll be reunited with them forever if you can follow some basic rules of governing self behavior. I don't know how you would choose...but I'll take that chance that my faith is in fact true. I have too much at stake to loose. I have an amazing wife, 4 beautiful children, 2 sets of parents, 4 sets of grandparents, 8 siblings. I either go through life thinking that these 40, 50, 60, maybe 70 or 80 years with them is it...or I believe that I can be with them forever.

I have lost Rachel's Dad and one set of Grandparents in this life. I miss them tremendously. But I refuse to give up the hope that I will see them again; AND that they participate in my life even now. Even if it's not true, I'd rather just believe that it is. It gives me hope. The death of my Grandfather has motivated decisions I've made since 1998. If I count up the accomplishments I've had since that fateful day...it's enough to write a book. I didn't do all those things for me, to achieve greatness, glory, or even popularity. I did them to right a wrong, to honor my father & mother, to support, love, and protect my spouse & children. If I die and it was all a lie...who cares...I'll be dead. But while I live in this life, if life chooses to keep trying to kick me, I'm going to kick back. I'm going to believe that things will get better. I'm going to believe that I'll get back the people I've lost. I will believe that wrongs will be righted and relationships will be restored. I'm going to believe that ultimately we will all return to our God that loves us. I'm going to believe all those things, not because someone told me to, or benefits from me if I do; but, because I BENEFIT because I believe those things.



I have an eternal perspective because it gives me hope and gets me through my day. So what if I give up on a few things because I've made covenants to avoid certain things. "Wickedness never was happiness." I hear all the gossip at work about all the things I could be doing if I chose to live that way...honestly...it doesn't seem any better than what I choose to spend my time on. When I stated before that what happens in this life matters right now, while we are still here. I meant it. And when life gets hard, that eternal perspective matters...and it matters right now.

It Must Matter Now

I am an existentialist, no doubt about it. What the heck is that you say? Well, for those of you who don't read Sartre, Nietzsche, or Dostoevsky (all examples of existential philosophers) , an existentialist is someone who believes that what we have right in front of us (life and its experiences) is what is ultimately real. It's not that existentialists don't believe there is life after this one (although atheists like Nietzsche and others may certainly hold that belief). The mark of an existentialist (as I see it) is that what matters right now, in this life, matters most.

The term "eternal perspective" doesn't sit well with me. When I hear it, I'm instantly reminded of Karl Marx's comments about how religion attempts to convince you that you will "eat pie in the sky when you die"...as a way to get people to look past their terrible circumstances they have in this life. For Marx, the belief in an afterlife that "religion preaches" was to lull a congregation or people into submission so that those with more power, money, or privilege could maintain their lifestyle on the backs of the poor working class. It's this type of action which prompted the communist political or social system which was created or imagined by Marx.

As a quick aside, I believe strongly that the system Marx envisioned has never been present on the earth due to the way in which communism has been implemented by those who were communists or fascists. The very system Marx envisioned to alleviate the suffering of the poor working class and to set everyone on equal footing was used to create the system seen in "Animal Farm" in which "some were more equal than others". The system of government used during the Nauvoo Period of early Mormonism is the closest I can imagine to what Marx was truly after with his system of government/society (although many Latter-day Saints will have a violent reaction to my comparison of the "Universal Order" or "Law of Consecration" with Communism).

So, now that we have a basic understanding of what existentialism is...why does it all matter? It matters because life matters right now. Living for the promise of something better after this life misses the mark. This life is terribly hard. Constantly "looking forward" to something better means that we will often miss what we have in front of us right now. I understand that for 80% of the people in the United States (maybe even more) life is quite simple if you have a job. Many people get caught up in the pattern of work, television, and sleep. That pattern of waking up, going to work, and then coming home to watch hours of television until we go back to bed gets lived by hundreds of millions of Americans daily.

It's usually not until something happens to disrupt this pattern that someone unplugs from the Matrix to take a look around. How often do parents look back on the years when their children were young and wonder where all those years went...too often. For months, I have worked between 12-20 hours a day as I lived & worked 1730 miles away from my wife and kids. There was little reason not to push myself daily to work all that I could. The money was needed and I had little else to do with my time that was worthwhile.

All that changed Thanksgiving Day when my family finally arrived in North Dakota to live with me. It's not that there will not be long hours worked in the days ahead. It's not that I wont long to be home when I am working. Until we are in a terrific shape financially, I'll continue to work long hours until all the bills are paid and we have college paid for at least a couple of our kids. Heck, we need to replace the retirement savings we spent all those years we barely made it each month. It will probably take years to pay off all the disasters that have happened to us in the last 3 years. It'll take years to replace the thousands that we spent of our retirement to keep afloat. One of the guys at work has been trying to get me to quit my night job ever since I moved to North Dakota. Every time he brought it up, I would tell him what I was getting paid each year for a measly 16 hours a week. He didn't do a very good job convincing me of the merits of having time to myself, getting a full nights sleep, etc. But, what he couldn't do in the 10 weeks or so he tried to get me to quit...was accomplished in about 30 seconds by my 4 year old daughter as she clutched my neck and wished me a good nap before I head off to work. When she told me she missed me & to have a good work...I couldn't help but stay up a few more minutes to hang out with her.

It's true that many of us...probably most of us have debt...and many of us will die with it. That was his argument for me to quit my job. He was concerned that the time I did get with my kids wouldn't be as good as it could be because I would be tired or in a bad mood. And, while I do a pretty good job keeping up my spirits despite the amount of sleep...very little in this world is worth those precious minutes and hours I might miss with my kids. So, while he might not have made the debate team, or win a case in court as a result of his persuasive skills...he was still right about what was a better use of my time.

Sure, I believe that families can be together forever. Heck, I even believe strongly that mine will be. But that doesn't mean my time with them right now, here, on this earth is less important. In fact, it's more important than those moments I'll have with them after this life. Imagine what life after this would be like if you didn't take the time to get to know your family while you can. I find it difficult to imagine that the loving bond parents and children or spouses have for each other would be that strong without spending time in this life to strengthen those ties. We have all heard about fathers or mothers who leave their young children when the weight of the responsibility is too much. When they try to come back into the lives of their children once they are adults...it's difficult, if not impossible to make up for all those lost years. Anger, regret, contempt are all held on to tightly when a parent leaves a child.

When this life is over and we all look back, together, on the choices we made in this life on what to spend our time...it will be difficult to look at each other in the eye when we see how the time we had was spent. You are inevitably making a decision to not spend time with spouse, children, family, and friends when you choose to undertake certain activities. Few if any will ever utter the words: "I wish I had worked more, beaten one more level, or gotten my WOW character one more level up when I was alive". I do fear, however, that too many of us will state strongly that we wish we had more time with those we love...especially when they leave this mortal plane and we are still in it.

There are many activities we will undertake that will require the sacrifice of our time. Those who are patriarchs must fulfill the duties owed to family for their safety and support. Many, too many, single mothers must be the only source of support for their families due to actions of others outside their control. Many of us will be called upon to serve others who do not have the resources we do, or to lighten a burden, or because we can. The time spent ensuring proper family finances and time spent in the service of others are worthwhile pursuits for all of us. But, we should be careful of the time spent alone playing video games, watching television, reading, or working. While these activities are not bad or evil...all of the activities can often be done alongside others. Imagine reading alongside a child or spouse and then talking about what was read. How much more can you get out of your reading when it is shared? Beating a level in a video game is a near worthless pursuit...but time spent between a father & son, or husband & wife will provide moments of laughter and fun when done in the right spirit. Working with others often means having to put aside ones own ego for the betterment of the team. It means learning how to work together, not always doing things your way, and teaches us patience (for those who are willing to learn the lesson).

So, when you decide what you are going to do with your time this weekend...consider who you will be doing it with, and for what reason. The moments we have each day are precious and we should be careful how we spend them. This life matters. When tragedy strikes, it is nearly impossible to see the benefit in the trials we face. It is hard, painful, and sometimes close to debilitating when we are hit by the struggles of life. It's tempting to turn our thoughts to the future, when we can imagine better days. And while it is comforting to know that life will not be terrible forever; we should take the opportunity to be reminded of the people we have in our lives that make it worth living. Allow the trials of life to remind us that parents, spouses, children, and friends are what make this life terrific...not the houses, cars, and gadgets we can purchase.

We have all heard that "he who dies with the most toys, still dies". That statement couldn't be more correct. While that doesn't mean we should "eat, drink, & be merry for tomorrow we die"; it does mean that we should strive to make this life count. Make the moments we have matter. Hug someone you care about and let others know what you think about them. Make the sacrifices you need to grow as a person and to achieve your goals. But remember that this life is about this life. Time must be spent here and now becoming better, growing. You may have heard the cliche "live every day like it is your last" over and over...maybe even too often. But it doesn't make it any less true. This life matters. It matters a lot. If you don't live it well, not only will you be miserable; but you probably don't have to worry too much about the next life.

They say when life throws you lemons, that you should make lemonade. It's hard. Sometimes when life throws you lemons, you feel like you just got hit in the head with lemons. Heck, sometimes you feel like Randy Johnson is throwing them at you (think Geico commercial where he knocks the guy over and dents the garage door a couple hundred feet off). Those moments hurt & we shouldn't pretend like they don't. Instead of your faith telling you that it'll be made whole in the next life, considering letting your faith tell you it will get better in this life. I'm not talking about revenge or justice. Little is gained when "justice" is achieved for heinous crimes committed against humanity. An "eye for an eye" simply makes two blind people instead of one. But, when forgiveness is granted to someone who "shouldn't" have it...something about the very human heart changes. When you stop to take a beggar to lunch instead of throwing them a dollar or pretending they are not there, something happens. When a person does what is necessary to get a job after they have been without...something changes. And it changes here, right now, in this life.

Sure, everything we do has "eternal consequences". But, for those who do the "right thing" because there is some great eternal reward waiting for them...they are missing the point of "choosing the right" and may find out that rewards like those are waiting for those who care more about their neighbor than themself. It's like proclaiming that you are humble...it doesn't work so well. Try helping someone else get an eternal reward. When you feel that your burden is heavy, try to find someone elses' burden which you can help make light. When you lose a friend or loved one, try becoming a friend or loved one to someone who needs one. We have been told that when we lose ourselves...we will actually find ourselves. So, when you have some time, lose yourself in the service or friendship of someone else...and do it now...while it still counts.